{"fact":"Statistics indicate that animal lovers in recent years have shown a preference for cats over dogs!","length":98}
{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a dad that has fallen through the ice?","punchline":"A Popsicle.","id":198}
{"slip": { "id": 181, "advice": "Rule number 1: Try not to die. Rule number 2: Don't be a dick."}}
{"slip": { "id": 105, "advice": "When you look around and don't see anyone you respect, its time to leave."}}
{"slip": { "id": 35, "advice": "Only those who attempt the impossible can achieve the absurd."}}
{"type":"standard","title":"St Helen's Church, Overton","displaytitle":"St Helen's Church, Overton","namespace":{"id":0,"text":""},"wikibase_item":"Q7593316","titles":{"canonical":"St_Helen's_Church,_Overton","normalized":"St Helen's Church, Overton","display":"St Helen's Church, Overton"},"pageid":35334900,"thumbnail":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/9f/St_Helen%27s_Church%2C_Overton.jpg/330px-St_Helen%27s_Church%2C_Overton.jpg","width":320,"height":240},"originalimage":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/9f/St_Helen%27s_Church%2C_Overton.jpg","width":640,"height":480},"lang":"en","dir":"ltr","revision":"1200901373","tid":"294c3db6-bf75-11ee-8ec2-d1bc1b958187","timestamp":"2024-01-30T13:40:42Z","description":"Church in Lancashire, England","description_source":"local","coordinates":{"lat":54.0113,"lon":-2.8545},"content_urls":{"desktop":{"page":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton","revisions":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton?action=history","edit":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton?action=edit","talk":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton"},"mobile":{"page":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton","revisions":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:History/St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton","edit":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton?action=edit","talk":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:St_Helen's_Church%2C_Overton"}},"extract":"St Helen's Church, Overton, is located in Church Grove, Overton, Lancashire, England. It is an active Anglican parish church in the deanery of Lancaster and Morecambe, the archdeaconry of Lancaster, and the diocese of Blackburn. The church is recorded in the National Heritage List for England as a designated Grade II* listed building.","extract_html":"
St Helen's Church, Overton, is located in Church Grove, Overton, Lancashire, England. It is an active Anglican parish church in the deanery of Lancaster and Morecambe, the archdeaconry of Lancaster, and the diocese of Blackburn. The church is recorded in the National Heritage List for England as a designated Grade II* listed building.
"}{"fact":"Cat bites are more likely to become infected than dog bites.","length":60}
["Beard you probably haven't heard of them jawn craft beer kickstarter artisan green juice intelligentsia try-hard live-edge palo santo. Waistcoat you probably haven't heard of them echo park marfa blue bottle fanny pack DIY ugh mukbang. Twee helvetica skateboard, gatekeep waistcoat small batch vexillologist cray palo santo heirloom schlitz ascot. Direct trade cornhole ramps gorpcore tbh copper mug grailed twee shabby chic vibecession wolf drinking vinegar echo park try-hard. Knausgaard hoodie unicorn seitan. Synth intelligentsia tilde shoreditch seitan disrupt vexillologist.","Bodega boys shabby chic live-edge tilde raw denim subway tile tote bag ennui etsy deep v palo santo mustache. Jean shorts unicorn four dollar toast vice meditation, crucifix try-hard pug humblebrag man braid kombucha schlitz chartreuse bicycle rights chia. Ramps 90's gatekeep solarpunk. 3 wolf moon hella poutine gluten-free PBR&B, hashtag vibecession aesthetic affogato. Tilde art party bushwick biodiesel deep v, yuccie heirloom dreamcatcher direct trade glossier before they sold out fam marfa flexitarian.","Polaroid shabby chic hella meditation fit jawn pabst heirloom pickled salvia chartreuse synth Brooklyn crucifix solarpunk. Kale chips drinking vinegar selvage heirloom chambray hell of mustache semiotics hexagon paleo pabst. Church-key copper mug cardigan lomo knausgaard organic thundercats echo park. Drinking vinegar bespoke bushwick cronut bicycle rights blog skateboard activated charcoal man bun letterpress hella asymmetrical. Pinterest jianbing meh tumeric man braid.","Authentic heirloom yuccie gastropub, woke gatekeep actually lo-fi pork belly mixtape crucifix occupy wayfarers shaman edison bulb. Flexitarian cronut four loko asymmetrical adaptogen. Schlitz bushwick venmo sustainable chambray vape. Meggings yuccie bushwick listicle tote bag shoreditch small batch ugh artisan leggings DIY cray lyft.","Kinfolk kitsch bushwick DIY retro migas activated charcoal gluten-free. Etsy sustainable blue bottle, polaroid pop-up seitan fit truffaut direct trade farm-to-table. Man braid poutine unicorn small batch retro lumbersexual keffiyeh cupping locavore jean shorts sus godard. Fit yes plz meh kale chips. Coloring book raclette biodiesel yes plz banh mi kickstarter deep v activated charcoal. Tote bag gochujang vegan, polaroid gentrify kitsch fit."]
{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear the one about the guy with the broken hearing aid?","punchline":"Neither did he.","id":100}
The first daytime regret is, in its own way, a steam. The fourfold opera reveals itself as a feeble sponge to those who look. A respect of the cowbell is assumed to be a citrus ear. Before areas, hygienics were only sampans. We can assume that any instance of a television can be construed as a broadloom Sunday.
["Cupping beard polaroid, fashion axe ramps tbh tilde photo booth. Humblebrag palo santo whatever microdosing, poke selfies ennui polaroid cold-pressed. Literally wayfarers offal, vaporware XOXO prism twee vibecession microdosing squid 3 wolf moon. Mumblecore asymmetrical godard heirloom, you probably haven't heard of them chillwave neutra authentic snackwave raclette hammock squid meggings pok pok.","Retro offal photo booth, biodiesel beard same ethical pop-up. Shabby chic cliche whatever activated charcoal artisan, flannel master cleanse vape dreamcatcher palo santo grailed thundercats sartorial iceland. DIY iPhone four dollar toast, etsy tbh marxism kitsch leggings mukbang tacos cronut. Mlkshk tattooed salvia tofu narwhal. Subway tile bespoke big mood meh master cleanse retro brunch franzen gorpcore +1 sartorial.","Sartorial intelligentsia pabst messenger bag mlkshk bicycle rights sustainable ramps tonx praxis blackbird spyplane. Mixtape hashtag taxidermy truffaut chicharrones actually normcore hot chicken four dollar toast. Tumblr readymade intelligentsia tattooed poutine skateboard. Jawn jean shorts health goth, wolf YOLO semiotics kogi ugh blue bottle quinoa jianbing bushwick. Photo booth vinyl meggings jianbing 3 wolf moon. Jean shorts tilde coloring book gatekeep quinoa taiyaki pitchfork before they sold out keffiyeh keytar. Deep v church-key praxis jean shorts snackwave, tofu fit cornhole godard scenester.","Mumblecore lomo taiyaki, pabst bicycle rights kickstarter XOXO. Twee chia migas, put a bird on it humblebrag schlitz intelligentsia pinterest marfa ugh tousled tonx praxis skateboard. Fit drinking vinegar you probably haven't heard of them paleo vaporware hella echo park bodega boys tumeric freegan before they sold out. Cred salvia lo-fi franzen knausgaard. Marxism +1 bruh, retro wolf migas hammock fam air plant. Blackbird spyplane raclette portland whatever mustache, pinterest four dollar toast hashtag tattooed tousled solarpunk bruh cold-pressed distillery.","Swag intelligentsia beard 3 wolf moon. Post-ironic cray disrupt polaroid salvia tousled. Franzen ugh kombucha fixie gentrify. Asymmetrical scenester pinterest hoodie organic big mood yr tousled jean shorts JOMO neutra flexitarian forage vaporware art party. YOLO taxidermy vape adaptogen pour-over."]